


called it!

by bejeweeled (orphan_account)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Earth-C, F/F, Fluff, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Minor Angst, Shortie, not really christmasbut its a christmas present for yall uwu, self-indulgent fic for me lmao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-27 08:47:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17158910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/bejeweeled
Summary: karkat vantas is a mess. so is dave strider.





	called it!

**Author's Note:**

> this fic is mainly for me because im feeling sad this christmas and im bored lmao. have a happy holiday and this rushed oneshot that makes absolutely no sense when it comes to plot. uwu

your name is karkat vantas, and you forgot just how much you hated suits.

okay, we can back up just a bit to get the juicy intel on your blacktie hatred; today was the annual party that kanaya maryam, your moirail, and rose lalonde, her flighty wife, held every human “year” to celebrate both their wedding anniversary and the day you all step foot into your new universe. you didn’t hate this party, so to say, but you hated the dress code instead. 

it never seemed to fit you; the fancy button up shirts and jackets and dress shoes that made you want to explode. kanaya personally made your suits and dresses and whatnot so that’s not what bothered you; you just liked loose fitting and comfortable clothes better. you would much rather wear a sweater and sweatpants to this stupid event.

and not to mention, this event was huge. since you were one of the people that ‘beat’ lord english and whatever other evils tried to kill you all, you were required to go. all of the people of earth c were invited, and almost everyone went. so flash forward to you having quite the panic with your slightly wasted moirail on a cold ass balcony.

“god, kan, i really don’t know if i can fucking do this,” you moaned, fiddling with the cufflinks on your sleeves. you would kill to rip these fuckers off and snap them in half. but you didn’t, of course, because kanaya hand made them and you would feel guilty as hell afterward. “there's so many more people than last sweep- er, year- and its only half of the people that were invited! im not even giving a speech and im freaking the fuck out!”

kanaya just stared at you with a pout. “i know you feel uncomfortable, karkat, but you can’t just barge out right before the ceremony and what not. this is important, not only for rose and i, but for everyone. including dave, whom i believe is searching for you right now,” she said, her words just barely slurred. you were happy that kanaya was letting loose a bit, if only for one night.

“what the hell does he want?” you groaned, but you were thinking quite the contrary. you would kill to see him right now; his endless jabbering could do you some good in distracting you from how uncomfortable you were.

kanaya smiled. “i don’t know,” she said, but you could tell she was lying. “just remember that you should never feel that you are… as the humans say, cheating on me with dave. we are moirails, yes, but what you have for dave is more… human. just… don’t feel guilty, all right?”

you felt your cheeks heat up. “er- yeah. where did that come from?”

kanaya turned away and stood up. you could still see the sly smile from where you were sitting. “ nowhere. now, let’s go. we can’t be late.”

you stood up and sighed, fixing your suit jacket and slipping your shoes on. you couldn’t wait for this to be over with. 

“oh, wait, one last thing!” kanaya declared, pulling something out of her handbag and grabbing your chin rather tightly so you wouldn’t budge. “close your eyes.”

you groaned but obliged, resisting the urge to squint or open your eyes.

kanaya let go and capped whatever she had, shoving it back in her bag. “before you even ask,” kanaya started, walking inside. “it was eyeliner. i thought your boyfriend would like it.”

you groaned and felt your face light up, holding your face like the lovestruck boy that you were and entered the ballroom, almost forgetting about how uncomfy you were.  
\---  
your name is dave strider, and you are freaking the fuck out.

okay, we can back up just a bit to get some more intel on why you were freaking; you didn’t really mind parties or crowds, so you were fine there. kanaya was incredible at making clothing, so you weren't feeling awkward either. it was just… there was a small box in your right pocket that was feeling extra heavy right now. 

“what if he says no?” you asked your sister, dread coming over you as you pulled the box out of your pocket. it was black with a velvet finish, and inside was a rather expensive rose gold wedding band with three delicate gems in the center. “god, rose, what if i just royally fuck up? do trolls even understand the concept of marriage?”

rose smiled at you like you were an idiot. “dave, kanaya and i have been married for three years, and karkat is a complete romance sap. i think he knows what it is.”

you sighed and slumped back into your chair, grabbing the glass of wine rose had supplied you with and took a small sip. it was disgusting, but you kind of needed liquid courage if you were going to stand up on a stage and give a speech and shit (and not to mention trying to propose to your boyfriend right after?).

seeing that you didn’t respond, rose continued. “i don’t think karkat would ever think about saying no, david. just ask him tonight.”

you huffed and nodded in defeat, shoving the box in your jacket. “i knew he wouldn’t say no… it’s just…”

“just what?” rose asked, leaning her chin on her fist (like a psychiatrist). 

what would bro think? “nothing. i think it should go smooth enough if i don’t start rambling like always. i usually don’t care… but tonight… i don’t want to fuck it up.”

rose rolled her eyes as you took another sip of the wine. you didn’t know how people drank this stuff.

“let’s go and get this over with,” she joked, leaving from her seat and walking up to the stage at the front of the ballroom. you followed behind her pushing your aviators up against the bridge of your nose.

john gave his speech about how honored he was to be a god and help the people of earth c. 

jade gave her speech about how she was delighted to start a new space expedition program and how she loved living in the new universe.

rose gave a speech about how meeting everyone during sburb was great and she never wanted to give anyone up, all this sentimental shit, yadda yadda yadda. 

then it was your turn. you didn’t have anything typed out and prepared, but you did have a vague idea of what you wanted to say. the last year or two you didn’t have to give a speech, so you figured it would have to be big.

you tapped the microphone nervously and everyone snapped to attention, oh god. “well. hello everyone. happy aniversary, rose and kanaya,” you said, and the crowd already erupted in cheers. you cleared your throat and then continued as everyone dialed down. “thanks for coming everyone. for those who don’t know, i am dave strider. i am a knight of time, and a god, all that cool shi- stuff.”

you could feel everyone's stares bore into you. “first of all, i just wanted to say that this wasn’t easy. everyone up on this stage, whether or not if they god tier-ed, have been a hero. we also left behind a hell of a lot of people and things on our respective planets, and we all still regret one thing or another. i didn’t have that good of a life before the game and whatever, so im glad that we are here today.” you didn’t say anything else in the fear that you might choke up. 

“so yeah. im not the best public speaker, but i hope that my words can be interpreted sorta well. i feel super lucky for everyone on this stupid stage and all that they have done for us to be here today. thanks. enjoy your night.” you stepped away from the mic and you gave rose a stink eye. she just gave you a delighted smile. 

kanaya wished everyone attending to have a good rest of their night, and you all stepped off of the stage. 

god, now you were seriously screwed!

you were thinking about chickening out and retreating to roses room to down a few bottles of liquor and cry your eyes out, but before you could leave, you felt a tiny tap on your shoulder. 

“you did fine, stop worrying,” rose giggled from behind you and took another sip of her martini. “i could feel the anxiety flowing off of you in waves.” 

you just stared at rose. “im gonna go hide in your room,” you said, kind of hating yourself for retreating so early. 

rose hummed, her lips down-turning. “i think karkat was looking for you.” 

“i don’t really have the guts to go talk to him, though. i really… really want to do this, but my nerves are being stupid as shit. so i need to go get drunk first or something.” 

your sister grabbed your hand and dragged you to the corner of the ballroom. “listen, david-” she said rather harshly, pinching your hand. she knew that got on your nerves. “you don’t want to be wasted when you propose. you want to remember it. it doesn’t have to be tonight if you really don’t want to, but… how long have you been dating?”

“five years,” you groaned sounding like a child.

“dave, he has probably waiting for something like this for a few years. i don’t want to push you, but… you have the ring and it's the best time. im going to go spend time with kanaya.”

rose left you alone and you felt a little stupid. she was right, as always. your feet feeling a little lighter, you set off to try and find karkat.  
\---  
you would think that your platinum haired boyfriend would be easier to find, but its a lot harder than it seems with a room full of most of the people in the area. 

if you were being honest, you were feeling quite upset right now. 

dave has been ignoring you all night, especially when you needed him. kanaya could only do so much until she got bored and you just felt guilty for holding her up. 

so yeah. 

you were hoping that it wasn’t because dave wanted to “break up” with you; you couldn’t handle a separation right now. or any time, really. dave really helped you feel better about yourself, and if he broke it off… 

god, you sounded like a gross wriggler!

as soon as you were getting discouraged, you found dave; he was standing in the corner of the ballroom, watching rose as she walked away from him. he started to walk away soon after, and you raced through the crowds, feeling stares on you (mostly from trolls). most trolls there were wearing ties or a dress of their blood color; you were wearing a grey tie.

god, that made you feel even worse.

“hey, strider!” you called once you got close enough to dave. he turned around and smiled a bit. 

“hey, karkat! whats up?”

he looked like he didn’t even care that he had been ignoring you… 

“why have you been fucking ignoring me?” you asked, a deep frown surely planting itself on your face. you didn’t want to seem too accusatory, but you said it and you didn’t want to keep backtracking until you said something nicer.

he stared at you with a deadpan, but you could tell he felt guilty by the slight downward twitch of his lip. “follow me,” he said suddenly, and you grabbed his hand as led you through the crowd. 

dave led you out to a moonlit balcony that was just down the hall and just next to the ballroom. you could hear the bass of trashy pop music through the walls. “listen, dude…” dave started, not letting go of your hand. “i have to talk to you.”

you felt your face fall even more than before. “don’t tell me you’re..” you muttered, not meeting dave’s stare. 

“god, no! karkat, i don’t know if trolls had this on alternia or not… i’m guessin’ not, but since kanaya is i figured you would know some shit about it.” you held in a huge sigh of relief. okay. it wasn’t what you were thinking…

but what, then?

“so like… kanaya and rose are power lesbians, y’know? power couple. and like… rose proposed to kanaya because, y’know… she wanted to stay with her forever. spend her whole life with her.”

you got absolutely none of that. “i got absolutely none of that.” 

“so, since you’re a big ass romantic sap, i figured i wouldn’t have to explain all this shit to you, so…” dave trailed off, fidgeting with something in his pocket.

he got down on his knee and you swear to got you almost had a heart attack. “karkat vantas… marry me?” he flicked open this little velvet box with a ring inside. it looked expensive as shit. 

your mouth was barely working, and all you could do was hold your hand over it like an idiot. 

idiot! idiot! say something!

“god, yes!” you said after a moment, trying to wipe the tears from your eyes. dave tried to stand up, but you engulfed him in a hug and you guys were in a pile on the ground. you pressed your lips to his and you couldn’t wipe the dumb smile off of your face. “i can’t believe i thought you hated me, im such a fucking dunce,” you muttered after you broke apart, wiping at the spot under your eyes and trying not to smudge the thin line of eyeliner on your lids.

“your eyes look nice,” he commented, grabbing your hand from your face and slipping the ring onto your ring finger. he leaned forward and kissed you again, cupping your face gently. “and i can’t believe i thought you would say no… i was debating getting drunk as hell and hiding in roses room because i was so fucking scared… so fuckin’ nervous about what my bro might say, but…”

dave sniffed and continued, flicking his shades up off of his nose and engulfing you with his bright, ruby eyes. “but fuck him. i don’t care. i love you… so much, karkat.”

you fidgeted with the ring on your finger with a smile. “yeah. i love you too, dave.” you kissed your boyfriend- er, fiance- one last time before standing up and taking your time to go back to ballroom.   
\---  
your name is rose lalonde, and you fucking called it! 

you and your wife, kanaya, watched these two, stupid boys on your balcony above theirs and resisted the urge to whoop and whistle and all that jazz. 

also, you owe kanaya thirty dollars which kinda sucks.


End file.
